How about we lose the resolutions and instead look at something more productive? Dig a little deeper, and maybe, just maybe, with that will come the lasting power that we all seem to be searching for: More happiness, less stress, and healthier bodies. What if we let go of resolutions and stop becoming list makers to check off our boxes and start becoming Intenders and Surrenderers (yes I know this is not a word, but just flow with me)
I think we may have gotten away from the point. We think of resolutions. We confess. I’m going to give up drinking for the month of January, or I’m going to do the 30 days challenge, etc. And while these are obviously healthy goals which are absolutely attainable, are they in fact meaningful to bringing change into OUR/YOUR life? If so, then have at ‘er. But its like we’ve come up with these blanket goals that as a society we’ve held up upon us which generally speak to the rule… give up, clean yourself up, go without, lack etc etc etc in an attempt to fit in with society expectations. I’m all for self improvement, perhaps too much so, but we have become so out of tune with our own thoughts and ideas about what makes us happy and HEALTHY that we are missing the very goal of all of this because of these pressures or resolutions, which is to better oneself.
So I was thinking the other day, in a world where we are constantly trying to change ourselves: getting rid of our gaining… fat, wealth, happiness, success, what if we look forward and just surrender. To all of it.
Surrender:// To give up in favor of another, especially voluntarily
Interesting way to put it. In favor of another…what would you give up in favor of something better?
It has taken me some time to just begin to understand the art of surrender and how powerful it can be. Although as a society we look at it as conceding, it is not so simple nor accurate. In fact, it is the only way we are able to fully bring change into our lives in FAVOR of something better. Which brings me to…
Intention:// An aim that guides action; an objective
An objective. Not a oath written in stone and plastered on paper. Who’s intention would that be? But an idea that pushes us forward. This is the wind
When we look at our goals, we see deadlines, graphs, checkmarks, when really shouldn’t we be the keepers of our own race? Do we need little gold stars next to our name to show we did something hard. If so, than shit, lets make our own boards at home. I’m serious. Put it on the fridge, give yourself a gold star, because yes, you fucking deserve it. Not because you pushed yourself to please everyone else, but through your own resilience, determination, decision making and strength, you made it through. ON.YOUR.OWN. YOU decided to wake up early to go to the gym, YOU decided to bring more love into your life. YOU DID IT YOUR WAY. I mean isn’t that the point?
Ok. So here is the next part. All of this is the idea, but our action, our action is COMMITTING. Not talking about it, thats another famous sidekick to resolutions. I mean actually follow through. This is where it can get hard. The pitfalls of failing to thrive on new goals lay in these zones most of the time
- Setting unrealistic expectations
- Not believing in ourselves (that negative golum-like voice)
- Not being SPECIFIC and
When we plan to be fierce in our intention, we must come at it with equally as fierce a game plan.One that is sustainable and healthy. Forward moving, absolutely, but also one in which lifestyle meets goal for the greater good of long term change. You don’t go out having never run before being able to run a marathon, so why expect that of yourself? Not only will you burn out physically and emotionally, but you will let yourself down and chances are, dislike something that was intended to bring happiness into your life. Remember, health equals happiness. Lets get back to this.
We are our own worst enemies, and so when things get hard we have a natural learned instinct…WE BAIL. Throw in the towel, quit, sleep, drink whatever. This is NOT SURRENDERING. We have programmed our mind to hear the negative chatter before the positive, and unfortunately we all know which one is stronger. SO we listen to that fella. But that voice inside is you, and you have a chance to say no, I deserve more for myself and am going to push new boundaries to see where they lead. Recently I have been experimenting with this when I have a challenging workout, I think on the regular, “why the eff is this still so hard? I guess it will always be.” And so I don’t push but I instead stay in that median of discomfort and frustration, working hard, sure but not changing. But then one day I thought, ok, this is just another gate to push myself through. It’s a gate that is saying you’ve come this far, far enough to feel it, and when you are ready if you push through you’ll have achieved something new, and so you keep going until you reach the next gate. There is no ultimate destination. Imagine feeling frustrated that your workout seemed too easy, that day can come…until you move to the next.
We also use blanket statements, which set us up for failure as we avoid wether on purpose or not, understanding what we are going to have to do to achieve success in our intentions. We don’t go to the store, buy the ingredients on the list, and just dump them all together and a cake comes out. We have to have direction, recipes, instruction, nuance that is going to support us getting there.
Lastly, excuses. No not for other people. Yourself. I am talking to you. We all do it. I don’t have time, can’t afford, am bad at, thoughts. Sure we can truly be all those things if we don’t again make room for different perspectives. It shouldn’t be easy, but it will be surprisingly so when you start implementing new thought patters in your head. Imagine waking up every day for a year early. Maybe thats a big enough change. It’s actually huge. You will provide yourself with the environment and space maybe to do more writing, walking, meditating, even just actively relaxing. Whatever it is, changing your thought perspective of I can’t, to I will.
SO…Many of us have felt as though 2016 was a shit year, I’ve been seeing this a lot lately. I’m not sure that I agree or deny this, but it is certainly the consensus. Every day we have the opportunity to change ourselves for the greater good. Not only for ourselves but for the world. If you are saying this wont make a difference, you are wrong. We EACH have the opportunity to affect ourselves and one another in an act of rebellion towards loving more, helping more, and being more, but it all begins with you. It has to.
So I said no lists, but I didn’t say no art…
NOW YOU. NOW US. Lets do this…..
YOU ONLY NEED:
1.Something to write on ( i like large poster paper)
2.Something to write with ( maybe multiple somethings)
*It helps if you can make it beautiful. Believe me. some ideas below*
-glitter (if you are into that kind of thing)
Making two columns:
1.Write down things you want to bring in for your life in 2017? Remember get specific
2.What things do you want to get rid of, mentally, emotionally, personally or physically?
What are the steps you are going to have to take to get there for each of the above? Again, details matter
What are you going to give up so these intentions can cultivate?
What doesn’t serve you? The way you talk to yourself, others? Toxic friendships?
And what does?
This may get you no closer to what you want in your life, but I believe it will, and if it history proves right, giving yourself the best fighting chance is always the best necessary first step. Set yourself up for success, not failure. Even when that negative voice cue Golum, inside tells you its game over, remember who is really in charge.
When we surrender to what is, we make room for what can be. We push farther for that which we intend for ourselves and for others, as long as no matter what we stay in the game.
Going into 2017, I want to be the tortoise in this rabbit race. I want to be focused more on what is going elevate me, not disappoint and discourage me. I want to focus on pushing myself to my limits, within that which is going to lift me up, and not tear me down. I am nowhere near my potential and I am going to get specific and I am going to achieve. I want the same for you.
Sending you health, peace and happiness, however that looks for YOU
See you all in 2017